TF Confidential: Stop Ruining Your Life

There are no workouts or recipes in this post, but I hope that what it says will help you.

Because I want you to stop ruining your own life.

Get out of your own way.

Stop beating yourself up.

Here’s this whole post, in an easy-to-save-to-your-phone flowchart.


I don’t think I will surprise anyone when I say that things in life don’t always go the way we plan them to go.  We might even say that things rarely go the way that we plan for them to go.  However, life goes on and we, too, have to go on.

Be here now, right?

Sure, sure, move on and let it go.  It sounds good on your screen, but how about in real life?  Let me show you how it might work.  These are real life fitness situations that I have encountered in my personal life or with a handful (or bucketful) of training clients.

Problem: Missing a workout (or 10)

Ruin your life by: obsessing over your missed workouts. Obsessing so hard that you continue to miss workouts because you’re trying to make everything perfect.  Try so hard to make your workout schedule perfect that you don’t work out for months.

Stop ruining your life by: letting go of the missed workout(s) and doing whatever you can in this very moment to get in some fitness activity.  10 push-ups?  20 squats?  Awesome.  Take the next step, whatever it is, and do it now.  Your workout doesn’t have to be perfect or on a perfect schedule, it just has to get done!  Fitness is about consistent effort, not about day-to-day fluctuations.

Problem: Eating fast food when you already know that it’s not part of a healthy lifestyle

Ruin your life by: obsessing over the fast food that you’ve already eaten and can’t un-eat. Falling into a deep depression because you went off your plan and made yourself sick.  Restricting your calories for the next week as punishment.  Binging on more fast food because you’re so ashamed of your “mistake”.  Giving up because you’ll just “never” do better.

Stop ruining your life by: letting go of the questionable meal choice and making your next meal healthy.  Committing to take care of yourself inside and out.  Remembering that you are worth the best.  Carrying a healthy snack (almonds, some sort of food bar, string cheese, a citrus fruit) in your bag or car so that you’re always armed with something to snack on.

Problem: Your favorite piece of clothing isn’t fitting the way you want it to and you wanted to wear it TODAY

Ruin your life by: sinking dramatically into bed in a fit of despair, certain that you’ve failed at your fitness efforts and will never again wear your favorite clothes.  Beating yourself up for not reaching your goals yet. Skipping whatever activity you were trying to dress for because you “just have nothing to wear”. Buying a ton of clothes 2 sizes too small to “motivate” yourself into reaching your goals.

Stop ruining your life by: putting on something else and letting go of the fact that the clothes didn’t fit today.  You can’t change it in this moment (not even with Spanx), so stop obesssing over it! Put on something tried and true – leggings? – and get out the door.  Go be awesome even if you are wearing your second choice outfit; no one else will care.  Tell your trainer so they can help you reach your goals and find any gaps in your current plan.

What’s the difference between ruining your life and not ruining your life?

How you respond to challenges.

Challenges are a fact of life.  Things will happen in your life that will knock you down, send you off course, and make you doubt everything that you thought you knew.

But should you give up?

Do you quit that easily?

Anything worth having won’t come easily, and unfortunately that includes all things fitness-related!  Even if you think your trainer just woke up magically strong and fit and ab-alicious one day, you are sadly mistaken…everyone in the world has worked so, so, so hard for what they have.

Even you.

So, don’t QUIT…just quit ruining your life.  Life is hard enough on its own.  You don’t need to make it even harder for yourself!


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